Obama’s Urination Legislation
*From an EmailSenators.com exclusive, President Obama, Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi, and Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, are working on what might be our nation’s most important piece of legislation: all male citizens above the age of 12 will be required by law to urinate while sitting!
According to our insider source, speaking on the condition of anonymity, the administration “sees male urination while standing as a health risk and a filthy habit. Germs are spread in this manner, exposing any number of unsuspecting individuals to potential health hazards”.
Our source indicated that “the requirement for SDU [sitting during urination] is derived from the recently passed health care reform bill. According to the bill, health care can be denied if a male individual can be shown to urinate while standing”. It is still a mystery how to enforce such a law due to the obvious assumption of privacy and the associated difficulty of proving whether a male citizen is urinating while seated or standing.
Apparently this odd law was inspired by Germany. Although not mandated by law in Germany yet, sitting while urinating is quickly becoming the social norm. Standing while urinating is no longer considered PC and many households are not without a sign or sticker above or near the toilets which demands: “Do not urinate while standing!”
Aside from the purported health risks attributed to “urine splatter”, standing while urinating is considered sexist, an attempt by men to elevate themselves over women since they, physiologically, are almost required to sit while urinating. The law is therefore also intended to create a sense of equality among the sexes.
